One of the biggest questions girls have before sorority recruitment is simple:
What am I supposed to talk about?
After all, you’ll be meeting women you’ve never met before. Some conversations may feel easy right away. Others might take a little more effort to get going.
The good news is that you don’t need a list of perfect answers.
Instead, it helps to understand what makes a conversation feel natural and what you can do when you aren’t sure where to take it.
Start With What You Already Know
Your own life gives you plenty of things to talk about.
High school activities, sports, family traditions, hobbies, summer plans and college interests can all become part of a conversation.
Think about the things you genuinely enjoy.
Perhaps you love your sport and could talk about it for hours. Maybe you’re passionate about volunteering, traveling, art, music or a particular subject in school.
Those interests give the woman you’re talking to a chance to learn something real about you.
The best topics are usually the ones you don’t have to force.
Ask Questions That Give Someone Something to Talk About
A question doesn’t have to be complicated to start a good conversation.
Instead of searching for the most impressive thing to ask, show genuine curiosity about the person sitting across from you.
Questions about her major, hometown, activities, experience in the chapter or favorite part of college can open the door to much more.
For example:
- What made you choose this college?
- What do you love most about being in the chapter?
- What are you studying?
- What do you like to do outside of school?
- What has surprised you most about college?
From there, listen to the answer.
A good follow-up question often creates a better conversation than jumping immediately to another topic.
Don’t Turn It Into an Interview
This is one of the easiest mistakes to make.
Asking question after question can start to feel like you’re working through a list.
Instead, let the conversation go back and forth.
When she mentions something you have in common, talk about it. If she tells you a story, respond to it. When something catches your interest, ask another question.
The goal isn’t to get through as many questions as possible.
The goal is to get to know each other.
Talk About More Than Your Résumé
Your activities and accomplishments are worth talking about.
However, you don’t want every answer to sound like you’re reading from your résumé.
Instead of simply saying that you were captain of a team, explain what you enjoyed about being part of it.
Rather than listing every organization you joined, talk about one that meant something to you.
A story usually gives someone much more to connect with than a list of accomplishments.
Let your experiences show your personality.
Don’t Be Afraid to Talk About the Little Things
Not every conversation needs to be deep.
Some of the best connections can come from everyday topics.
A favorite restaurant. A funny class. A hometown tradition. A concert you recently attended. A television show you can’t stop watching.
Small details can lead to bigger conversations.
You might discover that you have something unexpected in common.
Don’t underestimate the value of an easy, genuine conversation.
What If You Don’t Have Anything in Common?
It will happen.
You won’t connect with every woman over the same interests, and that’s completely normal.
Curiosity can take the conversation somewhere new.
Ask her about something she mentioned. Find out what she enjoys about college. Learn about her experience in the chapter.
You don’t need to have the same hobbies to have a good conversation.
Sometimes the most interesting conversations happen between people who aren’t exactly alike.
Let the Conversation Have Some Pauses
Silence can feel uncomfortable when you’re nervous.
That doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong.
A short pause gives both people a chance to think about what was just said and where the conversation might go next.
Take a breath if you need one.
There is no reason to rush into another question simply because the room becomes quiet for a moment.
A natural pause is not a failed conversation.
What If You’re Naturally Shy?
You don’t need to become the most outgoing person in the room.
Confidence can look different for everyone.
For some girls, it comes naturally. Others become more comfortable after a few conversations.
Start by making eye contact, smiling, listening and asking questions.
As the rounds continue, you’ll likely find yourself settling in.
You can be a quieter person and still make a strong connection.
Pay Attention to How You Feel, Too
Recruitment is not only about making a good impression.
You’re learning about each chapter at the same time.
Notice how you feel during your conversations.
Are you comfortable? Are you interested in what the women are telling you? Do you enjoy spending time with them?
Those reactions can tell you a lot.
You’re not just hoping they like you. You’re figuring out whether you like them, too.
Don’t Memorize Your Answers
Preparing a few topics beforehand can be helpful.
Memorizing responses, however, can make conversations feel stiff.
Think about your experiences instead of writing out exactly what you’re going to say.
Know the stories you might want to share. Remember the things you’re passionate about. Have a few questions in mind.
Then let the conversation happen.
Preparation should make you more comfortable, not make you sound rehearsed.
What If the Conversation Doesn’t Go Perfectly?
It probably won’t every time.
One conversation might feel effortless. Another could feel a little awkward.
That’s normal.
You are meeting new people, often in a very fast-paced environment. Nobody expects every conversation to be perfect.
Try not to replay every sentence afterward.
Take what you learned, reset and move on to the next conversation.
One awkward moment does not define your recruitment experience.
The Best Conversation Advice I Can Give You
Don’t walk into recruitment thinking you have to impress everyone.
Walk in ready to get to know people.
Be interested.
Listen.
Share your stories.
Ask questions.
Let your personality come through.
Most importantly, give yourself permission to be a real person instead of trying to deliver the perfect recruitment conversation.
The women you’re meeting are getting to know you. At the same time, you’re getting to know them.
That’s what recruitment conversations are really about.
Final Thought
If you’re preparing for sorority recruitment, conversation skills are worth thinking about before you arrive on campus.
You don’t need to practice scripted answers or memorize a list of questions.
Instead, become comfortable talking about yourself, asking questions and showing genuine interest in someone you’ve just met.
Those skills will help during recruitment, but they’ll also serve you well long after recruitment is over.
Be prepared. Be curious. Then let the conversation happen.
I fyou are looking for help, please reach out! I am happy to answer questions! Email me at rushworthycoaching@gmail.com or check me out at www.rushworth.com.
